“Balloon Boy” Parents to Turn Selves In, Stop Distracting America
The most pressing issue facing our nation comes to a dull end:
DENVER — The Colorado parents accused of concocting a publicity stunt by pretending that their young son had climbed aboard a homemade helium balloon and was hurtling through the skies above Fort Collins, Colo., will voluntarily surrender to authorities as soon as charges are filed, which is expected to happen on Wednesday, the lawyer for the father said Monday morning.
David Lane, a Colorado civil rights lawyer who is representing Richard Heene, said both Mr. Heene and his wife, Mayumi, would plead not guilty and would turn themselves in to avoid further public spectacle.
Ummm, I think we passed the point of avoiding public spectacle once the Colorado Air National Guard mobilized to chase down the hot air balloon that you said had your kid in it.
Mr. Lane contended that placing handcuffs on the Heenes, in the full glare of the news media and for their children to see, would be abusive to the youngsters.
Again, probably should have thought about that before you hid your son in the attic while you told the world he’d flown off in your hot air balloon. Morons.
Among the charges the Heenes might face, the sheriff said, are three felonies: conspiracy to commit a crime, contributing to the delinquency of a minor and attempt to influence a public servant. The last carries a possible prison term of six years.
Oh well maybe there is still something interesting in thi–back to work, America!
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