Christian Values: School Founder Offers Diploma for Sex

By Eric on April 19, 2008

Ah, there’s nothing like the smell of hypocrisy in the morning. A Houston TV station on Thursday exposed LaVern Jordan, founder of a local Christian school, offering to waive a student’s enrollment fees if the mother will agree to have sex with him.

Jordan: “For the uh, enrollment fee and stuff like that, maybe you and I can do something, you think?”

Mother: “Yeah, what, I mean what, what, you gonna wipe out all the fees?”

Jordan: “All the enrollment fees.”

Mother: “All the enrollment fees?”

Jordan: “Three hundred dollars.”

Mother: “So you gonna wipe everything if me and you get together?”

Jordan: “The enrollment fee, yeah.”

Mother: “Ok.”

Jordan: “If you and I get together.”

Mother: “What you mean? I mean, what?

Jordan: “Excuse me and I don’t mean to be so blunt but I am talking about f—— you.”

Mother: “You talking about what?”

Jordan: “F—— you.”
…
Jordan: “For the $300 I would expect maybe we could get together several times, you think?”

Mother: “Several times, whatcha mean several times?”

Jordan: “Well I don’t know, you might like whatcha getting.”

The school, which is now run by Jordan’s wife, responded in the appropriate Christian fashion: forgiving Jordan and demanding an apology from the network and the mother.

In regards to the “story” that aired on 4/16- 4/17 of 2008 on Channel 13, we would like to begin by informing you that the “story” was not told in its’ entirety, as no one requested an interview with Mrs. Jordan, nor did Channel 13 accept her offer for one.

Here’s the email that reporter Wayne Dolcefino sent to the school three days before the story aired requesting an interview from Mrs. Jordan. Okay, back to the ridiculous:

The Parkway Christian School,Inc. staff wants to remind you that we are all sinners saved by Grace, and we have forgiven Mr. Jordan for his wrong action.
…
[the school then quotes John 8:7, which includes the line: "If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her."] What do you think Jesus was writing in the sand? Was it the names of all the men that had been with the woman, or a list of all of their sins? Either way, it should help us all to realize that we are all guilty of sin and only God can be the judge of us.

Yes, everyone’s guilty. The school released another statement the next day, reiterating the claim that nobody asked them for an interview, but now they’ve been advised by their lawyers not to grant any interviews even if they do ask. Then, the real fun starts:

Furthermore, we would like to add that the woman in question did not handle the situation properly. Had she called to inform me of this incident, the matter would have been handled promptly and properly
…
Channel 13 and the woman in question owe Parkway Christian School, Inc. a public apology for the unjust manner in which the incident was handled. My family, students, and school should not have to suffer the blame for something that we did not know was happening.

Yes, how dare that woman not call the wife of the man who propositioned her in his truck! I’m sure Mrs. Jordan would have dealt with the matter immediately and not accused the mother of slander or ignorance. People always act in a reasonable, rational way when you accuse their husbands of cheating on them by extorting sex from poor women. And how dare she expose the man for being such a pervert! After all, nobody’s perfect. The Christian thing to do would have been to politely thank him for his generous offer, get out of the truck, and pretend that she hadn’t just been treated like a whore.

Now, I don’t have any problem with Christianity because the vast majority of Christians intelligent, reasonable people. The problem is when the really self-righteous ones–the ones who try to impose their beliefs on everybody else–become embroiled in all sorts of sex scandals and then abuse their religion’s concept of forgiveness to get themselves off the hook. By Monday, I’m sure we’ll hear that Jordan has prayed hard all weekend and come to the decision that God has forgiven him and that we should all just forget that the whole thing ever happened. And when we do, someone needs to be there to call him on the hypocrisy.

(h/t Pam)

Tags: ABC, Christianity, Houston, hypocrisy, LaVern Jordan, Parkway Christian School, Wayne Dolcefino

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There is 1 response to “Christian Values: School Founder Offers Diploma for Sex”

1. SYiUmL hi! hice site!

   —nick on July 29, 2008 at 4:19 am